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Title: the perfect spot to hear the apocalypse, acoustically speaking
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
kellifer_fic
Rating: All Audiences
Fandom: Big Bang Theory (Penny, Sheldon)
Warnings: None
Notes: Written for Fandom Free-For-All forishie who wanted apocalyptic!Sheldon shenanigans.
Summary: Penny, Sheldon and a big empty world.
"So, you know how you said only if I were the last man on Earth?"
"No, I said not even if you were the last man on Earth."
"Oh, well, given the statistical impossibility of that statement when you initially made it, I'm willing to allow you a small revision."
"Go to sleep Sheldon."
"Okay."
000
Penny was blonde, spunky and tough. She knew she had all the hallmarks of a survivor in an action movie. The only problem was, Sheldon didn't.
"You're supposed to be able to protect my virtue against the roving hoards of disfigured survivors wearing bad eighties apocalypse couture."
Sheldon just looks at her, like he often does, which is to say that he thinks she's speaking an entirely different language to him.
"I'm going to end up protecting your virtue, aren't I?"
Sheldon looks like he's going to argue for a second before he half-shrugs.
"I'm okay with that," he says.
000
Tap, tap
"Penny."
Tap, tap
"Penny."
Tap, tap
"Penny."
Penny rolls over in her sleeping bag and raises herself on her elbows so she can glare balefully at Sheldon. He's got his hand raised like he's thinking about resuming knocking on her forehead. "I thought without the benefit of a door you might stop doing that."
"The lack of structural accoutrement does not impact my ability to observe ritual."
Penny thinks by now she must have a Rainman-like ability to decipher nerd-speak.
She does the math in her head.
"You can be annoying even when we're homeless, gotcha," Penny says and nods. She then waits for a moment before realizing that Sheldon is just going to stare blankly back. "Well?"
Sheldon frowns for a moment, but then his face clears and he says, "I was just wondering if you were seeing me as the Professor in this scenario?"
Okay, so maybe she can't translate everything. "What the hell are you talking about?"
"You know, like in Gilligan's Island? Are you waiting for me to start inventing things that will make our lives more comfortable?"
"Sheldon, I'm not expecting anything from you other than to survive and maybe take a turn at foraging once in a while instead of making me go into the spooky empty stores by myself all the time."
"Oh," Sheldon says, picking at a thread on his shirt for a moment. "Because I mean I can try," Sheldon persists. "The principals of making a radio out of a coconut aren't exactly sound but if there were a Radio Shack nearby-"
"Sheldon, are you worried I'm going to leave you because you're not useful?" Penny asks slowly.
"Not at all," Sheldon answers promptly, clearly lying.
"Sheldon," Penny sighs. "At the moment, you're the only boy in the world for me."
"Um, okay," Sheldon says and scoots back down into his own sleeping bag. Penny turns her face to the fire that they set up before they bunked down for the night. It's still going and there's now a little pile of extra twigs and paper rubbish next to it which means Sheldon must have added to it and gone looking for more fuel while she slept.
Penny smiles.
000
Sheldon changed his Facebook status to Survived Apocalypse before they left the apartments behind. Penny had been amazed that it was still working but Sheldon had explained how things like that would be running for a while.
Actually, he'd started to explain and she'd promptly tuned out but that was to be expected.
000
She'd thought maybe Sheldon would be more prepared for something like this than her. Considering half of his television viewing was about futuristic post-apocalyptic survivors just trying to get by.
He's surprisingly inept at even the most basic things but then, of the two of them, it's actually more believable that she was the one that saw the outdoors more as a kid.
Penny doesn't really mind so much being the one to make fires and hold Sheldon's hand when he hears a spooky noise. For her birthday he managed to hook up an old generator in a small movie cinema and they watched Pretty In Pink on the big screen.
It didn't even bother her when he spent twenty minutes trying to find the optimum spot to sit acoustically.
In the darkness it wasn't so apparent they were all alone.
000
"Sheldon," Penny says, watching him pick fussily at the shirt he'd just appropriated up from an empty Walmart. He'd been lamenting about not being able to find a single shirt with a superhero logo on it and was now almost glowing with pleasure at unearthing a green t-shirt with a circle and a lightening bolt on it because apparently that meant something.
"I think this is the start of a fairly tolerable friendship."
Author:
kellifer_ficRating: All Audiences
Fandom: Big Bang Theory (Penny, Sheldon)
Warnings: None
Notes: Written for Fandom Free-For-All for
ishie who wanted apocalyptic!Sheldon shenanigans.Summary: Penny, Sheldon and a big empty world.
"So, you know how you said only if I were the last man on Earth?"
"No, I said not even if you were the last man on Earth."
"Oh, well, given the statistical impossibility of that statement when you initially made it, I'm willing to allow you a small revision."
"Go to sleep Sheldon."
"Okay."
Penny was blonde, spunky and tough. She knew she had all the hallmarks of a survivor in an action movie. The only problem was, Sheldon didn't.
"You're supposed to be able to protect my virtue against the roving hoards of disfigured survivors wearing bad eighties apocalypse couture."
Sheldon just looks at her, like he often does, which is to say that he thinks she's speaking an entirely different language to him.
"I'm going to end up protecting your virtue, aren't I?"
Sheldon looks like he's going to argue for a second before he half-shrugs.
"I'm okay with that," he says.
Tap, tap
"Penny."
Tap, tap
"Penny."
Tap, tap
"Penny."
Penny rolls over in her sleeping bag and raises herself on her elbows so she can glare balefully at Sheldon. He's got his hand raised like he's thinking about resuming knocking on her forehead. "I thought without the benefit of a door you might stop doing that."
"The lack of structural accoutrement does not impact my ability to observe ritual."
Penny thinks by now she must have a Rainman-like ability to decipher nerd-speak.
She does the math in her head.
"You can be annoying even when we're homeless, gotcha," Penny says and nods. She then waits for a moment before realizing that Sheldon is just going to stare blankly back. "Well?"
Sheldon frowns for a moment, but then his face clears and he says, "I was just wondering if you were seeing me as the Professor in this scenario?"
Okay, so maybe she can't translate everything. "What the hell are you talking about?"
"You know, like in Gilligan's Island? Are you waiting for me to start inventing things that will make our lives more comfortable?"
"Sheldon, I'm not expecting anything from you other than to survive and maybe take a turn at foraging once in a while instead of making me go into the spooky empty stores by myself all the time."
"Oh," Sheldon says, picking at a thread on his shirt for a moment. "Because I mean I can try," Sheldon persists. "The principals of making a radio out of a coconut aren't exactly sound but if there were a Radio Shack nearby-"
"Sheldon, are you worried I'm going to leave you because you're not useful?" Penny asks slowly.
"Not at all," Sheldon answers promptly, clearly lying.
"Sheldon," Penny sighs. "At the moment, you're the only boy in the world for me."
"Um, okay," Sheldon says and scoots back down into his own sleeping bag. Penny turns her face to the fire that they set up before they bunked down for the night. It's still going and there's now a little pile of extra twigs and paper rubbish next to it which means Sheldon must have added to it and gone looking for more fuel while she slept.
Penny smiles.
Sheldon changed his Facebook status to Survived Apocalypse before they left the apartments behind. Penny had been amazed that it was still working but Sheldon had explained how things like that would be running for a while.
Actually, he'd started to explain and she'd promptly tuned out but that was to be expected.
She'd thought maybe Sheldon would be more prepared for something like this than her. Considering half of his television viewing was about futuristic post-apocalyptic survivors just trying to get by.
He's surprisingly inept at even the most basic things but then, of the two of them, it's actually more believable that she was the one that saw the outdoors more as a kid.
Penny doesn't really mind so much being the one to make fires and hold Sheldon's hand when he hears a spooky noise. For her birthday he managed to hook up an old generator in a small movie cinema and they watched Pretty In Pink on the big screen.
It didn't even bother her when he spent twenty minutes trying to find the optimum spot to sit acoustically.
In the darkness it wasn't so apparent they were all alone.
"Sheldon," Penny says, watching him pick fussily at the shirt he'd just appropriated up from an empty Walmart. He'd been lamenting about not being able to find a single shirt with a superhero logo on it and was now almost glowing with pleasure at unearthing a green t-shirt with a circle and a lightening bolt on it because apparently that meant something.
"I think this is the start of a fairly tolerable friendship."