kellifer: (cool Rodney and John)
kellifer ([personal profile] kellifer) wrote2006-07-11 03:56 pm

FBR - "It's the Firewater That Gets You"

Title: It's The Firewater That Gets You
Fandom: SGA
Pairing: McKay/Sheppard (friendship/pre-slash/established, pick your poison)
Rating: G - Humor
Word Count: 574
Spoilers: None
Prompt: Rodney/John - tipsy
Summary: “Admit I’m right,” John said, slinging an arm over Rodney’s.

“Never in a million years,”


This fic was written for [livejournal.com profile] thepouncer



“I’m not drunk.”

“How come only drunk people say that?” Rodney looked John critically up and down, noting his more-than-usually rumpled appearance, heavy lidded eyes and the fact that there was a definite lean to him.

“I protest,” John said huffily and Rodney grunted.

“Protest what?”

John blinked blearily, listing further to the right to the point where Rodney had to reach out and correct him, and then snorted. “I forget,” he said, and then actually giggled.

“Okay, that proves it. You’re drunk.”

“Okay, maybe just the tiniest bit,” John allowed, holding up his thumb and index finger and squeezing them together to indicate the tiny scope of his drunkenness. Rodney reached forward and circled the air around John’s fingers with his own hand.

“This is the space that indicates your drunkenness I hope you know,” he said and John scowled.

“How come you’re not drunk?” he asked, pulling up short so he could lean on the wall because the floor had gone and started moving and that just wasn’t right.

“I don’t know, better constitution? Plus, I’m bigger than you.”

“Are not,” John snapped, his tone grumpy.

Rodney stopped John who had stumbled forward again, grasping both his shoulders. “Ah, yes I am.”

“Are not,” John insisted, crouching down.

“What are you doing?” Rodney squeaked but John just squinted up at him and grinned.

“If I can lift you, I’m bigger than you because I can’t bench-press my own weight so I certainly couldn’t lift you if you were bigger.”

“That’s just ridicu-- hey!” Rodney flailed when John grasped him around the thighs and heaved upwards, smacking Rodney’s head on the low roof of the corridor.

“See?” John gasped, his face going red and the tendons standing out on his neck.

Rodney landed awkwardly on his feet and stumbled back a step when John simply let go, so he could cross his arms and lean against the wall, his smug expression giving way to one of concern when he slid to the left and hit the floor.

“Floor’s a lot closer than I thought,” he observed groggily.

“Okay, fine, come here,” Rodney grumbled, grasping John under the arms and hauling him to his feet.

“Admit I’m right,” John said, slinging an arm over Rodney’s.

“Never in a million years,” Rodney snapped, managing to frog march them the few remaining steps to John’s room. He grasped John’s wrist and slapped his palm against the door control and manhandled him inside.

“Go on, admit it,” John sing-songed, sagging in the chair he’d been dumped into.

“I will never-“ In the middle of his sentence, Rodney collapsed face-first on John’s bed and began to snore loudly.

Ronon, passing by with Lorne slung over his shoulder, who was singing a fairly disturbing rendition of a Britney Spears song, paused to eye the collapsed Rodney and then look at John.

“How many times do I have to warn you all about the Firewater? You feel fine until you’re too drunk and then it’s too late.”

John snorted. “They never learn, do they?” he agreed, nodding and then catching at the back of the chair when he began to slide off.

“How’d you get him in here anyway, he’s bigger than you are,” Ronon asked.

John blinked at him. “I’m deceptively solid!” he shrilled and Ronon snorted, wandering down the corridor, accompanied by strains of “Oops, I did it again.”

“Ha!” Came the muffled retort from John’s bed.

[identity profile] archae-ology.livejournal.com 2006-07-11 06:23 am (UTC)(link)
Ronon, passing by with Lorne slung over his shoulder, who was singing a fairly disturbing rendition of a Britney Spears song, paused to eye the collapsed Rodney and then look at John.

“How many times do I have to warn you all about the Firewater? You feel fine until you’re too drunk and then it’s too late.”


*attempts to muffle laughter*

Holy shit that was great! And that mental image? It made me hurt myself. XD

[identity profile] starrylizard.livejournal.com 2006-07-11 06:55 am (UTC)(link)
"oops I did it again!"

Okay, so I was just amused until that point, but that made me snort. Glad I wasn't drinking anything, or it could have been messy. :p

[identity profile] http://users.livejournal.com/_inbetween_/ 2006-07-11 09:38 am (UTC)(link)
Deceptively solid?! Did you just call my J dense?!?!?

[identity profile] ceares.livejournal.com 2006-07-11 10:50 am (UTC)(link)
very cute. I love Rodney just collapsing like that.

[identity profile] taiteilija.livejournal.com 2006-07-11 11:26 am (UTC)(link)
Hehe. Very cute and funny! :D
sid: (McShep doorway)

[personal profile] sid 2006-07-11 11:29 am (UTC)(link)
Heee! Rodney suddenly collapsing was the best part. :-D

[identity profile] looking4tarzan.livejournal.com 2006-07-11 12:09 pm (UTC)(link)
OMG drunk lorne ROCK

[identity profile] adafrog.livejournal.com 2006-07-11 12:13 pm (UTC)(link)
bwaaa hahahaha lolol Awesome!

[identity profile] skoosiepants.livejournal.com 2006-07-11 12:49 pm (UTC)(link)
“I’m deceptively solid!” Oh man, this was adorable *loves*
ext_1094: (Default)

[identity profile] rrrosa.livejournal.com 2006-07-11 01:58 pm (UTC)(link)
Was *not* expecting Rodney to pass out--I got a good giggle out of that. And *this*!

John blinked at him. “I’m deceptively solid!” he shrilled and Ronon snorted, wandering down the corridor, accompanied by strains of “Oops, I did it again.”

ahahah

[identity profile] ferret-kitty.livejournal.com 2006-07-11 02:51 pm (UTC)(link)
::giggles:: Brilliant! I love Drunk!John so much. Thank you.

[identity profile] miera-c.livejournal.com 2006-07-11 03:56 pm (UTC)(link)
hee.

Poor Ronon, riding herd on these boys.

[identity profile] indigorhapsody.livejournal.com 2006-07-11 04:23 pm (UTC)(link)
Hee. John would be so much fun drunk. When he crouched down, I was sure for a second that he was going to check something else in the size department . . . :D
ext_2382: (My place 10 mins)

[identity profile] tipsywitch.livejournal.com 2006-07-11 04:42 pm (UTC)(link)
Brilliant!

Thanks for sharing!
ext_21473: (sga - ronon)

[identity profile] neverbelonged.livejournal.com 2006-07-11 04:58 pm (UTC)(link)
I need more drunk!lorne fic now. He's seems fun. /grins/ Great job. Loved it. And Ronon? Totally rules.
ext_1720: two kittens with a heart between them (Default)

[identity profile] ladycat777.livejournal.com 2006-07-11 05:00 pm (UTC)(link)
Ahahahahaha. This was perfect! Funny and snarky, and Ronon being long-suffering. Thank you!
ext_2456: (DH_facepalm)

[identity profile] nakedwesley.livejournal.com 2006-07-11 05:58 pm (UTC)(link)
Ha! I love John's pretense that he dragged Rodney back and not the other way around. (Or rather, that he doesn't correct Ronon.) Drunk!John is too adorable. I love him lifting Rodney and whacking his head on the ceiling.

This is just too funny!
ext_11979: (Superman what would he do? by Damo)

[identity profile] suki-blue.livejournal.com 2006-07-11 05:59 pm (UTC)(link)
Heeheehee! Funny!!

[identity profile] thepouncer.livejournal.com 2006-07-11 10:01 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh John! Oh Rodney! This was delightful!

[identity profile] barely-bean.livejournal.com 2006-07-12 04:19 am (UTC)(link)
I'm stuck on Lorne's sekrit love of Brittney Spears. And by stuck I mean traumatised. *g*

[identity profile] bluebrocade.livejournal.com 2006-07-12 07:00 am (UTC)(link)
ROTFLMAO! That was hilarious. Loved it.

[identity profile] spike21.livejournal.com 2006-07-12 10:32 am (UTC)(link)
awwwwwww! So adorable.

I love stories where they kind of mess up but it's okay and nothing really bad happens.

[identity profile] burntcopper.livejournal.com 2006-07-12 01:11 pm (UTC)(link)
:wails: why, why, have we not had a drunk!SGA ep yet?
ext_970: (give back)

[identity profile] tazzles.livejournal.com 2006-07-13 11:03 am (UTC)(link)
This is fantastic! “Oops, I did it again.”
I'm laughing here! Just fantastic.

[identity profile] 30toseoul.livejournal.com 2006-07-14 02:56 am (UTC)(link)
I giggled so much, I also feel drunk. *g* Thank you!

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